So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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