Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
my being single is dangerous.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
