I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
