I'm jealous of your bromance
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
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