My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
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