I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
