id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
