i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
