just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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