I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
