I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
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Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back