He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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