Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
