every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
