I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize