I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Randomize
