When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize