The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
