? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
