he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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