No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.