Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
