Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
