Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
