A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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