Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
