that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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