Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize