do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
only if we run a train.
done.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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