dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize