ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
