Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Screwed.edu
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Watching her eat just hurts me
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Randomize
