I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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