I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
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