Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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