I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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