Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
