It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
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