They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
