they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
This is classic penis vs brain.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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