That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
