doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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