if you like me you must not know who I am
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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