No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
love makes seman taste better
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole a fireplace last night.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize