so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize