I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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