if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I will pee on everything he values.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
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