My boss' voice literally gives me gas
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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