Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize