WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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