I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
