maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
