he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
