So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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